Today at work (I have a different job now, not bad, but boring) I decided that I needed a coffee mug that says "You don't have to be a braindead invertibrate to work here, but it helps!"
This is not to imply that my "co-workers" are mindless sqooshy globs of inbred retarded diarrhetic gorilla shit. I'm just saying that if the previously described fecal matter WERE to show up for work one morning, you'd be hard pressed to pick it out of the crowd.

During one especially boring task yesterday, I mentally did a cost-anaylisys of collecting multiple paychecks without going to work by training monkeys to do my job, vs. training dead monkeys to do my job. Dead monkeys are a lot cheaper, but somewhat harder to train and its hypothetically possible that they may decay to a point where they could no longer do my job. You may argue that necromantic ritual materials are quite expensive compared to the cost of a live monkey, but you'd have misunderstood. I said DEAD MONKEYS, not ZOMBIE MONKEYS. Magically animating the monkeys would be wasteful, and they might realize how boring the job is and quit. Then I would have no monkeys.
I like monkeys.

I also determined that if I were to ever create a robot duplicate of myself (a "co-worker" suggested this after hearing my monkey idea. My conversation with him lead me to suspect that someone had beat me to the dead monkey idea, but he didn't have a prehensile tail. [Maybe if he did, I wouldn't despise him as much]) I would have to prevent the robot from killing me and taking my place like they do in bad sci-fi movies. I determined that the best way to do this was to make the robot smart enough to realize that it wouldn't WANT to live my life.

More recently I had the idea of combining the robotics technology with the already approved dead monkey idea. This is, of course, a fantastically stupid idea, but I thought I'd mention it for one important reason. That reason being that I like to say "dead monkey cyborg." Try it, it's fun.

Seriously though, if I had the technical skills to build a perfect robot duplicate of myself (the previously mentioned non-dead-monkey co-worker kept insisting that that would be the greatest thing ever. <inside joke> Der grosste Gluck der Erde</inside joke>) I would certainly not waste such a valuable creation by having it go to work or school for me, as so many people keep thinking would be so great. In fact, I wouldn't even make the robot a duplicate of ME.
I would make it a duplicate of someone I hated. I mean someone I really, REALLY DESPISED. It would rob banks, and drop off small portions (so as not to be noticed) of the money at places I could get it. It would beat up other people I didn't like, leaving them alive enough to extract revenge on the poor sap I duplicated. It would publicly engage in incredibly naughty sexual acts with zoo animals. And just in case the robot were ever captured, the inner systems would be engraved with evidence to indicate that the robot was created and owned by someone else I didn't like. (Don't worry, at the rate things are going I won't run out of these people anytime soon.) Or maybe just rigged with explosives. Things that go boom when they die are fun.

Someone once told me that if I put as much creativity and effort into finding better employment as I put into thinking about my unholy army of ninja dead monkey cyborgs, then I'd... Um, well they said something would happen.
Oh yeah, they said that I wouldn't be stuck in a meaningless, mind-numbing summer job. The problem with this particular logic is that very few people are willing to pay someone to come up with phrases like "mindless sqooshy globs of inbred retarded diarrhetic gorilla shit." If you know someone who is, please have them e-mail me.
Besides, I'd rather have an unholy army of vampiric ninja dead flying monkey cyborgs(tm!) than a better job. Wouldn't you?