The Original David Bowie's Area Webpage





This webpage contains a big stupid block of text without any reasonable paragraph spacing that will probably hurt your eyes if you try to read it, and therefore should not be viewed by people with optic strain, vision disorders, or on a bright monitor in a dark room. If you meet any of these conditions, we can only pray that you've read this tiny warning before that big block of text on the main part of the page over there.

What the hell?

Bowie's Area accounts for the "missing mass" in the Universe, also known as Dark Matter. Bowie's Area causes time to curve. Bowie's Area wrote the Dead Sea Scrolls. Bowie's Area prefers the Purple Stuff. Four out of five dentists recommend Bowie's Area. Bowie's Area is where Waldo is. Bowie's Area is the number before infinity, and it sprays icy death from bloody stumps. Bowie's Area knows the ultimate question of life, the universe, and everything. Bowie's Area is like duct tape, it has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together. Bowie's Area knows yer damn words. Bowie's Area knows the Colonal's secret blend of herbs and spices. Bowie's Area can see those Magic Eye things. Bowie's Area helps those that help themselves. Bowie's Area called down the thunder, and now it's got it. Bowie's Area abducts aliens. Bowie's Area is not dead, not as you know it. Bowie's Area cannot be checked out of the library for more than two hours. Bowie's Area is more than just pi * radius^2. Bowie's Area can make a monkey with four asses. Bowie's Area wrote the "Goodtimes" virus. Bowie's Area is preffered in blindfold taste tests. Bowie's Area would have immediately asked about the little red button. Bowie's Area is on the bottom of the box, right after MonoSodium Glutemate. Bowie's Area needs a Thneed. Bowie's Area all things devours, Birds, beasts, trees, flowers, Slays king, ruins town, And beats high mountain down. Bowie's Area chose wisely. Bowie's Area is our last, best hope for peace. Bowie's Area is your father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate. Bowie's Area kill's 95% of all known germs on common household surfaces. Bowie's Area was always there, even before the nail hit the bunny. Bowie's Area is the first ever hair oil, foot ointment, and salad dressing. Bowie's Area coulda been a contender. Bowie's Area is going to need a bigger boat. Bowies's Area must wash hands before returning to work. Bowie's Area was filmed before a live studio audience. Bowie's Area is afraid it can't do that, Dave. Bowie's Area will huff and puff and blow your house down. Bowie's Area is, strictly speaking, never supposed to do this, but have you got a better idea? Bowie's Area is afoot at the Circle-K. Bowie's Area shows some of the ways performance monitoring has aided both the developers of VR Juggler itself, and those writing applications for it. Look upon Bowie's Area, it will Show You the life of the mind! Bowie's Area is coming to get you, Barbara. Bowie's Area said the secret word, made the duck come down. Bowie's Area makes mouths happy. Bowie's Area, no moshing or body-surfing allowed. Zi Dingar Bowie's Area Kanpa! Bowie's Area likes ribbons in its hair, and wants to kiss all the boys. Bowie's Area has Got Wang. Bowie's Area knows how to type with boxing gloves on.
Toward the end of 1998 I ran a contest to see who could figure out where the most of these references came from. At the time there were 26 of them that were deemed contest-worty, I didn't want to count the ones that were too easy or non-specific quotes. Here's a picture of the super smart doubleplus-good Winner!