Body-Slammin'

This is for everyone who enjoys profesional wrestling but has occassionally wondered if there was something not quite right about it.
For anyone who may have thought that professional wrestling may indeed be downright Hot and Gay.
For the guys on the wrestling team who called me a faggot in high school.
For any male who's ever said "You know, The Rock is really handsome. I mean, for a guy and all. Not that I'm gay, I'm just saying he's a good-looking man. But I'm not gay."
And especially for everyone who has ever tried to convince somebody else that watching two sweaty, beefily-muscled men wearing nothing but spandex pants or spandex short shorts with knee-high boots grope each other around the floor, grunting and screaming while their exposed flesh slaps, rubs, and thrusts against each other is a perfectly normal, completely heterosexual thing to do:

Sunday night at work one of the TVs was set to professional wrestling, I think it was the WWF. That one wrestler who's in charge of the WWF, Vince McMahan or whatever his name is, was in the ring in a suit yelling at some other bloated toughguy wearing a suit. He seems to be threatening to fire him, and keeps exerting primate dominance. He says that the other guy is going to have to kiss his ass if he wants to keep his job.

Okay, so they're yelling before a fight, trying to dramatize the grabass party a bit. That's fine. Then the boss-wrestler PULLS DOWN HIS PANTS. I swear I am not making this up, he lowers his pants, pulls his black spandex underwear into a sort of makeshift thong, and demands that the other man literally kisses his ass.

If wrestling were actually about fighting as it claims to be, this would be the part where the other wrestler not only refuses the disgusting and demeaning demand being made of him, but expresses his refusal firmly and confidently by sucker-punching his "boss" in the base of the spine. Is that what happened? No. What happened was that one man puckered up, applied the offered chapstick, and placed his lips directly on the white, fleshy ass-cheek of another man. That's right, folks, men kissing other men's asses. Not on a gay-porn network, not during a Marilyn Manson video, not on what some consider the fruity channels like Arts and Entertainment, but on mainstream professional wrestling. Time to get out of the closet and admit it, wrestling fans.