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| The Original David Bowie's Area Webpage |
     
This webpage contains a numbered list of uses for David Bowie's Area, listed backwards so that ostensibly the better things to do with Bowie's Area would be assigned the lower numbers leading up to the #1 Use and therefore should not be viewed by anyone who will get really anal retentive about the fact that I didn't really put them in much order of any kind.
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Top Ten Uses for David Bowie's Area
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10. Frequently obscures the sun, reducing your exposure to
harmful UV rays.
9. When children complain about being left alone at night, tell them "You're not alone, David Bowie's area is always with you."
8. Lower your Purity Test score, just by sticking out your tongue.
7. It's high in dietary fiber.
6. Always a good place to store your excess spandex.
5. Makes a good blanket on those cold, lonely nights.
4. Turn it into a running gag/inside joke with your friends. (Worked for us!)
3. Extract multi-purpose adhesive from it.
2. Feed the starving children in those loser countries.
1. Area-related web pages allow millions of people to realize that there are still some people who are more twisted than them.
