Language Corner

How to Swear Like an Edgy Comic

Simple use of obscene language is simply not enough to provoke shock, outrage, or laughter these days. Any idiot can use swear words, and most do. If you would like to be able to fling vile abuse upon someone in an appropriately humorous and edgy fashion, more is required. Fortunately, there's a simple technique that even you can use to make your obscenities more interesting. Simply choose one traditionally naughty (or disgustingly biological) word from Column A below and combine it with a nominally inoffense word from Column B. The words for these lists were carefully selected by studying their syllable structure, phonics, and by listening to the lead webmonkey play online games. Say your resulting compound word without pause between its components, and in a slightly condescending tone of voice. Try it today!