I need to set an appointment to go downtown and pee in a jar.

This is, of course, a prerequisite to gaining employment at a major photographic film development company that wants my hot body. Specifically, they want my hot body standing in their lab developing people's vacation pictures. Whatever, details.

Efficiency is important to an employer, right? Why did the interview where I tried to be more efficient by cutting out a time-consuming step go so poorly? It's not my fault the air conditioning in their offices was broken and the Human Resources guy thought my frothing cup of urine was Mountain Dew.

I'll never understand big business.