These are just things I write, okay? Sometimes they're profound insights
or funny stories and I'm really proud of them. Other times it's mindless
rhetoric that I've since completely changed my mind about and am ashamed
of. But most of the time it's just words.
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9/7/06
Harry Potter and the Warning of Spoilerz
J.K. Rowling recently hinted in an interview that Harry Potter may die in the last book. She didn't even have the common internet courtesy to yell "***SPOILER WARNING!!!*** and sit quietly for about a dozen lines first, either. Anyway, that clearly signals that the series is once more at the lull halfway between new books when one must reveal tantalizing yet pointless hints to remind everyone that there will, eventually, be another one in the series. And so, without further ado (except for this one: Ado!), it's time to reveal the many possible titles even now under consideration for
The Seventh Harry Potter Book
Harry Potter and the Acne of Awkwardness
Harry Potter and the Ending from SpiderMan
Harry Potter and the Lucrative Movie Rights
Harry Potter and the Major Character Deaths
Harry Potter and the Statute of Limitations
Harry Potter and the Messianic Metaphor
Harry Potter and the "Magical" Mushrooms
Harry Potter and the Inevitable Disappointment
Harry Potter and the Burger King Tie-In
Harry Potter and the Shards of the Fourth Wall
Harry Potter and the Incompetent Antagonist
Harry Potter and the Unbearable Lightness of Being
Harry Potter and the Old-Growth Forest He Turned to Paper
Harry Potter and the Wizardly Version of MySpace
Harry Potter and the Myriad Loose Ends
Harry Potter and the Culture of Life
Harry Potter and the Cameo by Aquaman
Harry Potter and the Burden of Student Loans
Harry Potter and the Unavoidable Terrorism Parallels
Harry Potter and the Age of Consent
Harry Potter and the Crushing Realization That Nothing Else I Ever Write Will Be This Popular
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