Middle Earth and Common Ground

My open letter to The Advocate:

At the beginning of Bruce Steele's article The gay guide to Middle-earth we are asked "What will draw lesbian and gay fans to the Lord of the Rings movies?" To which a sensible person replies:
A visually stunning re-telling of the definitive fantasy tale by the inimitable J.R.R. Tolkien, featuring a host of terrific answer's under the guide of a brilliant director.
or maybe just
It's a good movie.
or more to the point
Why does there have to be something specific?

I realize that as The Advocate your publication deals primarily with "gay issues," not generally fantasy cinema. Or at least not this type of fantasy cinema, per se. However, are you trying to tell your readers that gay and lesbian viewers need not go to a movie that does not have some sort of active or subliminal homosexuality? Heaven forbid that someone enjoy something for its own quality, regardless of whether it panders to his or her own subculture and agenda!

Mr. Steele's discussion of Frodo and Sam's relationship has the maturity of kindergarteners giggling while two young boys share a friendly hug, and shoving them afterwards. While I'm not going to argue against the likelihood that they shared something more then friendship beneath the surface of Tolkien's sexless narrative, suggesting that we might want to see the film in hopes of witnessing a pair of hobbits engage in "same-sex smooching" is ridiculous. Worse still, his descriptions of Aragorn, Legolas, and Galadriel remind me of all the teenage boys eager to see Tomb Raider because of Angelina Jolie's tits. Bravo.

In short: Grow up.

Sincerely,
A Reader.