Shockingly Honest's Greatest Hits

This is a song I wrote for a band that was to be in a book I was writing back in college. Actually, I should say these are the lyrics for a song, etc, because one of the advantages to it appearing in a story is that I didn't have to write any music for it. That's good, because looking at it now it doesn't really seem to have any rhythm structure or coherent rhyming pattern. Then again, I wrote this in 1998 or so, take a look at the popular music of the time before you criticize too heavily. I think it was supposed to be a metal power-ballad type of thing, but who can tell really?

"What I mind" by Shockingly Honest

If you get depressed
And you're gonna kill yourself
I don't mind. I don't care.
Your girlfriend dumped you,
Now you wanna slit your wrists.
I don't mind. Fine by me.

And if you're going to jump off a skyscraper
Bring a camera.
The rest of us would really appreciate that.
Take pictures. Take pictures. Take pictures.
Let your death give the papers
Something to print.

If you've lost your job and now
You want to chug those pills
I don't mind. Go ahead.
You're a loser, no one likes you.
What if you jumped in front of a train?
I don't mind. No big deal.

But. Don't. You. Dare...
Wear our T-shirt when you hang yourself!
Don't blow your brains out while listening to our CD!
I hate the blame!
It's such a pain!
It was YOUR life that made you miserable, NOT MINE!
And-Don't-You-Fucking-Quote-My-Lyrics-In-Your-Pathetic-Suicide-Note-You-Unorignal-Piece-Of-Shit!
Those are MY words and I'm not the one sucking off a gun.
If you can't even come up with a way
To describe your miserable self pity on your own
Well then I guess you probably won't be missed.

Other than that...
I don't mind.
Please don't blame a band every time
Some dumb kid offs himself. Because while we may not mind if do...

We certainly don't give a shit,
If
You
Don't.