"I can state unequivocally that it was only a matter of time."

Lousy, plagerizing monkeys!

I keep telling them they need to write something that hasn't already been published! But no, all I get is script after script of Hamlet! I've already read Hamlet, and what's worse I sure can't sell it. Now if only they'd write me a good sitcom, or a screenplay, or maybe the seventh Harry Potter book...

I also propose "Monkeypower" as the official unit of measurement for creative energy, somewhat akin to horsepower. If you are operating at One Monkeypower you have the same net creative output as a single monkey banging on a single typewriter (for however long you remain at that Monkeypower level). The corresponding unit of creative work, such as you'd use to measure the total amount of creative effort used in finishing a given artistic project, is the Monkeypowerhour. Examples: "I was running at several billion monkeypower when I got the idea for the monkeypower unit of measurement." or "That movie only took about three monkeypowerhours, and they weren't very good monkeys."

Enjoy.