As Promised, Sex

(Disclaimer: I've been out of town for a good chunk of this week, and will be again next. This is putting a damper on the vague theory that November would continue the trend of updating more often. Sorry about that. Anyway, I said we'd be talking about sex, so here goes.)

Up first for your edification, we have a brand new Remedial Dating Guide Visual Aid (For Chicks!). For those of you who have no idea what I'm talking about, start and the beginning and all that.

Meanwhile, more on the subject of sex: I'd like some! Ha-ha, I'm so painfully clever and funny. You are impressed, yes?

Actual thoughts: I believe I have commented before on the unfair double-standard towards promiscuity, differentiated by gender, in our culture. ie: A woman who sleeps around is a slut, tramp, whore, etc, while a man who sleeps around is a stud, a player, and generally more envied then despised. Some recent reflection on this topic revealed two things that are actually fairly obvious but frequently overlooked. On Women: You say "slut" like it's a bad thing. The negative associations with women who like sex, or at least have a lot of it, are almost entirely expressed by women. And the women who seem most aggressive in the hurtful name calling are those who use their own sexuality as a weapon. Or more accurately, a carrot on the end of the stick. They flirt with men more to get attention and favors than to get laid. Of course their biggest threat is the women who flirt with men because they have a healthy interest in sex. If you're holding out your body as a means to control a man, and there's somebody else around who'll sleep with him without the games, gifts, and jumping through hoops, your plan could be in jeopardy.

On Men: Hey wait, we're catty bitches too! The general perception is that society is more encouraging of men to be sleep around, or at least more forgiving. This isn't as absolute as it first seems though. Once we realize that there's a subgroup of women primarily responsible for maintaining the Slut negative imagery it's not too hard to find their parallel amoung the men. Find some shy boys (often the geeky, introverted types are a good example) and bring up the subject of Nice Guys and Jerks. You probably already know the type of response you'll get. "Nice guys never get chicks. Chicks always go for the assholes and jerks who don't treat them right, just screw them and aren't nice." What this really means is "We have to go on all these dates to get anywhere with a woman, but that Jerk gets laid all the time with no effort!" Maybe it's not that he's a jerk or an asshole or even really a bad person at all, he just persues encounters that focus on the physical without as many strings and long-term commitments... just like those "sluts."

Hmmm...

What do I really think about all this, though? As I've previously mentioned, Sex Is Pretty Cool.