Abstinence?
While driving on my little vacation recently, I heard a radio commercial promoting abstinence, particularly amoung teens. They wanted everyone to make a conscious decision to not have sex until they were married. That's all well and good. I may not entirely agree with their goal but I think it's fine for them to be publicizing the benefits of not getting laid. It's something few teenagers probably ever think about.

There were, however, some specific parts of the commercial that had me laughing myself into the uncoming traffic. I don't have a transcript, so all quotes are just to the best of my memory:

"Companies use sex in commercials to sell their products. As teenagers you're surrounded by sex on TV shows, in movies, magazines and even popular songs! The Media is trying to make you think sex is cool!"

They then went on to say something about how abstinence is the only way to be 100% safe from STDs, which is probably true but hold on a second here, radio. Back up and run that one by the folks at home one more time: Are you trying to say that sex is NOT cool????
If that's what you're saying I think you just shot you credibility right out the window. The Media's trying to make me think sex is cool, huh? Seems like popular opinion, biologic predisposition, and a few million years of mammalian evolution are agreeing with The Media on this one, people. Maybe you just phrased your commercial badly and meant to say that sex is only cool when it's within the loving commitment of a marriage, or that you can still be cool if you're not having sex. I'd accept either of those as valid opinions, but don't try telling us that sex isn't cool, okay? Maybe I'm just a tool of the Media here, but have you ever even tried it? It's pretty cool.

Besides all of that, don't you think they've got the cart before the whores, so to speak? Advertisers using sex in their commercials aren't trying to make us think sex is cool. There's no money in that. They're trying to make us think Their Product is cool. So we'll buy it. And they'll get money. They try to make Their Product look cool by making us associate it with sex, which has to presume we already think sex is cool. They keep selling products with sex, so it's a pretty safe assumption that most of us think it's cool. Know why? Me neither, but probably because it IS.

Film-makers don't say "A lot of people are going to go to this movie, let's put a topless scene in it so the audience will start to like sex!" But teenage boys DO say "What movie should we go to? This one, it has Titty!"

"If you have sex before you're married, you could contract a sexually-transmitted disease or have a child before you're ready. Not having sex is the best way to help all of your dreams come true!"

This commercial seemed to be aimed mainly at teenagers, (They probably assume everybody gets married at 18 or 19, which you would if that was the only way you could have sex) so are they talking to teenagers right there? Not having sex helps all of a teenagers dreams come true... I hate to break it too you, but when I was teenager, most of my dreams pretty directly involved Having Sex!

Because the Media convinced me it was cool.