These are just things I write, okay? Sometimes they're profound insights or funny stories and I'm really proud of them. Other times it's mindless rhetoric that I've since completely changed my mind about and am ashamed of. But most of the time it's just words.

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10/19/00

Axioms

Feel free to use any of these handy sayings as a personal motto, corporate slogan, or action-hero catchphrase.

If our hands had six fingers, we could never be sure which one to flip people off with.

Death comes for everyone, but not everyone comes for death!

Actually, I'm confident that my shit does stink! That's what the product testers are for.

If it's worth doing, somebody else already did.

We are not particularly resourceful.

Why start now?

Beef: It's what's going to get rammed down your lying throat.

Sweet, peaceful oblivion, how I long for you.

4d6 my ASS!

To hell with it all, merrily.