Ecstatic

Upon discovering this sudden happiness I wanted to yell something at the top of my lungs to inform the world (and also the troll in the next room) how incredibly happy I was, but I found myself at a loss: I couldn't think of any words to express this wonderful emotion, and all my default catchphrases I could fall back on have more to do with suffering, bitterness, sex, and violence. I had nothing to say! So then I thought I'd blare some music and dance around gleefully, but again I was at a loss: I don't have any really happy songs. When people are happy, they're usually too busy enjoying themselves to write music. Well, good music anyway.

So I wound up just kinda prancing around the apartment like a little fruit and smearing myself on the walls. But since I'm too happy to write about what I'd planned, I shall now express for you my joy the only way I really know how to write about emotions,
spitefully:

I am happier than you.

Also, I'm happier than you.

Hey you! You there, reading this... I'm happier than you!

Does anybody know who's happy right now? I AM!

Special message to all my dear friends: I'm happier than you, too.

To my friends who have been dealing with difficult issues, be it sexual confusion, unreturned love, poor self-image, continued loneliness, lack of direction, etc, etc: I am waaaaaaaaaaaay happier than you!
Suckers.

To everybody out there who has a wonderful life, and appreciates all their daily joys, and is already really happy too: Shut up, I'm still happier than you!

To anyone who is happy for me: Get your own happy, you leeches! I'm SO much happier than you!

Bahahahahahahahhahahaha!