These are just things I write, okay? Sometimes they're profound insights or funny stories and I'm really proud of them. Other times it's mindless rhetoric that I've since completely changed my mind about and am ashamed of. But most of the time it's just words.

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4/8/01

I'm home.

And I can see. More or less.

Lemme tell you something about the LASIK procedure, in case you were thinking about getting it done:
If the thought of laying on your back in a dark room full of masked people hovering over you with your eyelids spread wide open by a wire clamp, having the surface of your cornea sawed through, peeled off, and then smoothed back in place after a laser has vaporized the inside of your eye makes you at all queasy or nervous, don't worry.

You won't be disappointed, because actually having it done is every bit as terrifying as you imagine.

One added bit of fun: Since you have to stare directly at the little red dot during the procedure whenever my eye drifted away from center the doctor would yell "Look straight! LOOK MORE STRAIGHT!!"
Well excuuuuse me, mister doctorboy! Don't hate me because I'm beautiful.